The Longest Ride Home

Last Friday must have been my longest journey going home. Despite being on a night shift, last Thursday’s workload wasn’t really heavy. Nothing came up to cause me stress. So my shift ended well.

I rode a bus and was almost half-way already to my destination when I felt a stabbing pain at my chest. I started chasing my breath and gasping for air. The pain continued piercing me. I looked outside for possible hospitals to go to but there’s nothing near that I could think of. Negative thoughts started entering my mind. Despite my struggles to remain focused and breathing, I started to pray.

Dear God… please not yet. My family needs me. My son needs me so much. He only has me. Do this not for me but for him. Let me reach the hospital please.

And so, with prayers and God’s help I was able to rush to the hospital alone. I was examined for a few hours to determine the cause of my pain. 

Thankfully, it was just costochondritis (An inflammation of the cartilage in the rib cage) and nothing serious. 

My travel time usually takes only around an hour but that moment lasted so long. It was a very unforgettable experience and I can’t even think how I managed to have the courage back then to bring myself to the hospital alone. All I can remember are the worried faces of the nurses and doctor who quickly attended to me.

So up to now, I am still grateful to the Lord for hearing my pleas. He is always there whenever I need Him and I will always praise Him and rejoice for He never fails to save me. 

photo courtesy of Women after God

P.S. photo above courtesy of Women after God.

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To My Future Hubby

I’m not certain who you are or where you are right now. But please know that I’ve been waiting for you.

I am nothing special and honestly, my life is a bit complicated.  I am a single mom with one kid and also a breadwinner. I have very few achievements to call my own. I still have dreams waiting to be realized. And, my heart has been shattered and repaired several times. In fact, I have nothing much to offer you now…

Yet, I am deeply hoping that somehow, you’ll see me as someone worthy of your love.

To My Future Husband

I believe that you’ll come and step into my life. Maybe not right now or not right here. But, in the best time and place that God has planned for us.  Maybe you’re far from me at the moment. Or, maybe you’re someone just within my reach – someone waiting to be recognized.

Please be patient with me if I can’t see you now; if I can’t recognize you yet as my partner. I am a work in progress at the moment. Renewing myself and strengthening what’s left of my heart.

I understand if the same goes for you too. A lifetime partnership takes lots of preparation. So, let’s take this time to flourish ourselves before we get together. Don’t get me wrong though. Gone are the days when my expectations were so high and based on my childhood fantasies. I’m not wishing for a prince charming riding on a white horse anymore. In short, I don’t need you to be perfect. I just want you to be man enough to be mine.

So, till we’re both ready, I’ll wait. Yes. I’ll be waiting for you even if I’m not really a person with lots of patience. I will wait for you, because I know you’re gonna be worth it. And by the time when you arrive, I’ll love you with all that I am.

For now, just give me a hint or a sign when you’re around. That way, I’ll be reminded that there’s still a happy ending that awaits my weary heart (and that, true love is still real). Smile for me…

 

Only Yours,

Ruby